Transforming Trauma: Episode 157

One of the many consequences of complex trauma is a loss of self-confidence leading to self-doubt and difficulty trusting in one’s intuition. Some call it a hunch, others gut instinct. Regardless of terminology, this finely-tuned insight can become overwhelmed by the constant din of post-traumatic hypervigilance and anxiety, disrupting a person’s ability to hear their inner voice and make confident decisions. How do those healing from trauma revive their intuitive skills and learn to trust their inner knowing again?   

On this episode of Transforming Trauma, host Emily Ruth invites international speaker, author, and resident psychiatrist Dr. Samra Zafar to share her inspirational journey from an isolated teen bride to a courageous, intuitive, and powerful agent of change. The pair explore Samra’s practice of reconnecting to her inner voice and lean into its guidance after years of self-doubt. They also discuss how practitioners can apply their lived experience to therapeutic relationships and invite clients to access reserves of profound healing intuition.

“I truly believe all of us have that inner voice in us,” begins Samra. “Unfortunately, we live in a world where there are so many systems around us…that condition us to not listen to that voice. But that voice never goes away.” 

Samra, who was born in Pakistan, grew up in Abu Dhabi and as a teenager was shockingly forced into an arranged marriage to a man 11 years her senior. “You know when everybody around you tells you that something is right for you and that inner voice inside of you that is screaming, no?” she asks. “When you’re a child, especially, and all the adults around you are telling you this is the right thing to do, that inner voice gets silenced very quickly.” 

Samra eventually was able to escape a decade of marital abuse and religious trauma through covert support from campus counselors at the community college where she was allowed to enroll, and a desire to set a better example for her daughters. “I had grown up seeing every woman around me being abused and controlled in the name of duty, in the name of religion, in the name of the right thing to do. I had accepted it for so long in my own life,” she admits, “but now that I knew better, I wanted to do better for my daughters.” 

Samra has since become a global advocate for progress, spearheading belonging and wellness in organizations worldwide and lending her voice to help others via two books, four TEDx Talks, and multiple features in Canadian and international media outlets. Her message is born from her lived experience: “The courage that we seek is within ourselves,” she says. “Trauma is awful. It breaks, hurts, and harms us in many ways. However, as human beings, it is my firm belief, as a survivor and as a physician, that we have the capacity to make art from those broken pieces. That does not mean that what happened to us was okay. It means that we are more powerful than what happened to us.” 

And for that inner voice inside of us, Samra provides wise council: “We need to make space for that inner voice to be louder than the voices around us because that inner voice is our most trusted ally, is our best friend, and is the only guiding compass that we need to be authentic and be on our true paths.”

Transforming Trauma is grateful to Samra for entrusting our community with her story and providing us with an example of courage and intuition in action.

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE

A Good Wife: Escaping The Life I Never Chose

Unconditional: Break Through Past Limits to Transform Your Future

Toronto Life Magazine

The Body Keeps The Score 

McMaster University

University of Toronto

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Dr. Samra Zafar is an award-winning international speaker, bestselling author, and resident psychiatrist. After escaping a decade of abuse as a child bride in Canada, she went on to pursue her education and became a global advocate for progress. Recognized amongst Canada’s Top 100 Most Powerful Women, Samra is a trailblazer, spearheading

belonging and wellness in organizations across the world. She combines scientific research with hard-earned life lessons to share courageous strategies that lead to bold results.

Her speaking portfolio includes four TEDx Talks and speeches to leading corporations, non-profits, governmental agencies, and educational institutions. Samra’s work has been extensively featured in both Canadian and International media.